Dear Congressman Richard Hudson of North Carolina,
First, lemme just say, I love North Carolina! How gorgeous is Asheville,
huh?!
Hey, listen – I hope you won’t mind me reaching out, but in the midst
of all the news surrounding our new president’s super unconstitutional
executive orders, your introduction of new legislation effecting gun laws in
our country slipped right by me! My bad – I was distracted by that crying 5 year old American child separated from his mother in Maryland because he was born in a Muslim nation. Ya’ know how that goes! Kids!
Anyway, I came across your proposed bill this morning and figured so
long as the democrats, the ACLU, and like every single corporation in America
are dealing with the whole “raise your hand if you forgot what America stands
for” thing … I could take a little time off to address your National
Concealed Carry Reciprocity Bill, or as I like to call it, The Let’s Allow Everybody to Carry Secret Guns, But
Not Train People to Use Them or Require Permits to Have Them and Also Let’s Put
Them in Schools Too While No One’s Looking Cuz Kids & Guns Go Great
Together Bill.
I’ve pasted your comments from last month about your new bill below,
and have added my own comments beneath yours:
Our Second
Amendment right doesn’t disappear when we cross state lines, and this
legislation guarantees that.
It’s so good to know the amendments don’t disappear! That pesky
invisible ink story must’ve just been a rumor. I’ll keep that in mind while
listening to upcoming Executive Orders!
The Concealed Carry
Reciprocity Act of 2017 is a common sense solution to a problem too many
Americans face.
Gosh! Really? “Too many Americans” face the problem of not being able
to take their hidden guns from their own state to another? Are there tons of guys
in North Carolina hobnobbing around town with hidden guns in their underpants, turning
to their wives and saying –
“Hey Honey! You know what would be fun? Let’s go see a Broadway show! I hear Waitress just recouped!
And then their wives say -
“Oh, I’d love to Carl! You know how I love pie! But
we can’t! They won’t let us keep guns in our underpants in New York City.”
And
then the Carls say -
“Oh yeah. Guess we can’t go after all. There goes our
Broadway dreams.”
Congressman, you know what problems I think Americans are really facing?
Do you have any bills that could help those problems? Because 43.1
Million Americans are living in Poverty. What are the stats on super bummed Americans
who can’t carry secret underpants guns to the state next door? Less, right?
It will provide
law-abiding citizens the right to conceal carry and travel freely between
states without worrying about conflicting state codes or onerous civil suits.
Do you have another bill to propose for those people “worrying” about
the people traveling freely with hidden guns? Because, sign me up for that one!
If you’re concerned about people worrying – I know some people who are really,
really worried! My mom and I can be the leaders of your worrying movement! We
are PROS. Full disclosure: we are not one bit worried about not being able to carry
private panties pistols on planes. But we are up-at-night worried about the
essence of American democracy as a whole and Congressmen who try to pass worrisome
weapon related legislation while we’re concentrating on defending the
constitution against irrational, arbitrary, xenophobic orange man orders.
As a member of
President-elect Trump’s Second Amendment Coalition, I look forward to working
with my colleagues and the administration to get this legislation across the
finish line.
I do not like the sound of that coalition one bit. I can’t even imagine
how un-fun those meetings will be! So, I did a little digging on your behalf and
found another coalition – right in your home state! - that I think would benefit
many more of your constituents! Give it a whirl! The North Carolina Coalition Against
Domestic Violence. At their coalition meetings they talk about how
to get guns OUT of people’s underpants, out of their homes, and out of their
children’s nightmares. You oughta have a chat with them about how they feel
about your newly proposed legislation.
Well, we’ve come to the end of your comments! Oh, but wait, that’s so weird! You forgot
to mention two elements of your bill!
Oh right, oh right, I remember now! You
decided not to promote some of the bill’s provisions publicly. So strange!
Seems like you oughta be loud and proud about your plans to undo a federal law
prohibiting guns at schools by stating that concealed carry holders are not subject
to that ban. Secret guns in schools! Here’s
some info on how that’s worked out in the past. Guess what?! When there are
guns in schools … children and teachers get shot!
Your second
un-publicized provision would allow gun owners to sue out-of-state police officers
personally if that cop had the audacity to try to check if the gun owner had
the right to conceal carry in his/her own state. That’s quite a provision,
Congressman! Setting up a “take my word for it” system for gun-toters! Ever asked a 2nd grader if he's brushed his teeth? He's gonna say "yes." But, know what? He's lying. I'm guessing your gun guy/cop plan might have a similar result.
Anyhoo, just wanted you to know I’m paying attention! This
bill gets double thumbs down from me! My pals at Moms Demand Action and The Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence
give it a double thumbs down too.
Turns out a big problem “many Americans face” is your
Bill.
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